Love Me Harder
by nightmvre
Summary: Settling into domesticity for the night, with thoughts of another woman clouding my head. / In which Cat and a married Beck explore the meaning of extramarital. [BeckxCat, M later on]
1. keeping up appearances

**A/N: **I've been watching Mad Men during my holiday and wanted to step out of my Bori-comfort zone.

Please review and subscribe if you like it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious.

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><p>I slammed the door of my Jaguar behind me, jogging up the steps to my Newport Beach mansion, stabbing the key into its hole before opening the front door of my home. Normally, upon coming home, I'd find a silent home with my children mesmerized in front of the television and my wife thumbing through magazines on the couch. But today, my home was alive with noise and excitement. But, to be reasonable, I usually arrived home at about 8 or 9, if I even bothered to come home at all, and today I arrived at 6.<p>

"Tori? I'm home," I called as I trekked further into the house.

"In here!" she called, before her voice blended in with the rest of the chatter. I followed her voice to the living room where I found my kids rolling around with a familiar dog whose name I couldn't quite place and my wife sitting on the couch with a glass of wine in her hand as she spoke to a person who sat in the couch across from her. She looked up from her conversation and beamed at me.

"Hey! You're home early!" she said as she put her glass down and approached me, hugging me and giving me a full kiss on my lips before saying, "Look who's here!"

Our guest turned around from her seat, smiling at me and raising her glass of wine in acknowledgment. "Hey, Beck!"

"Oh, hey, Cat, didn't know who you were for a sec," I said in reply, taking a seat on an armchair adjacent to her. "Guess the dog was a big hint. What brings you out to Newport?"

"Yeah, this my new dog, Cinnamon!" she laughed. "Well I just rescued him for a shelter closeby so I thought I'd visit you guys and see your fancy new house! It's amazing!"

"Isn't it? We just finished decorating," Tori said as she plopped down in my lap. "The only thing is the commute. It's more than an hour away from Beck's office in Hollywood, without terrible LA traffic! That's why I was surprised he was home so early. Sometimes he just stays the night in our old apartment in Beverly Hills to avoid the commute."

"Small sacrifices for my wife's dream house," I muttered. "Besides, it's a better place for the kids to grow up in. Better environment, a lot more suburban than Beverly Hills."

"Yeah, I bet they like it! Lots of hide-and-seek places in such a big house, right, kids?" Cat asked.

"We like the pool a lot," Ben smiled. At 5 years old, he was our oldest child, born just eleven months after our wedding. April came just two years after him, when Tori and I were 27. April nodded shyly along with her brother before returning her attention to Cinnamon. She was almost a carbon copy of Tori, as Ben was of me.

"So how have you been, Cat? What've you been up to?" I asked, shifting under Tori's weight.

"Well I just came back from New York. I was visiting my brother, he's on broadway now," she smiled. "I'm just working on another album right now and I booked a few movie spots too, but those don't start shooting until the end of the summer."

"Isn't she amazing?" Tori exclaimed. "What I wouldn't give to be acting right now! I was in talks for a few roles, but I really want to focus on the kids right now." She was lying; I took many days off during pilot season so that Tori could attend auditions but she hadn't been called back for many. I offered her help, but she refused, stating she didn't need her "producer-husband's Hollywood influence to get her a role."

"I'm sure you won't have any trouble finding a role once you're ready," Cat giggled. "30 with two kids but you still look 22!" She checked the watch on her wrist and looked out our large windows. "I better get on the road. Calabasas is a long way from Newport." She stood up, with Tori following suit, and the two embraced.

"I'm so glad you stopped by! You should visit more often, I never see you anymore!" Tori said as they pulled apart.

"Of course! And if you're ever in Calabasas, you should call! I've got lots of dogs for the kids to play with if you two ever need a babysitter," she said.

"Well I'm sure the kids will be happy to make the hour-and-a-half trip there just to see them," I said as I gave Cat a quick hug.

"Mommy, we're hungry!" Ben whined.

"Oh crap, I lost track of time. I gotta make them some dinner quick, Beck will see you out!" Tori said as she shuffled into the kitchen. "Bye, Cat!"

"Bye, Tori!" Cat said as she put on her coat and walked towards the door, with me on her heels. "Really a beautiful house you have, Beck, it must have cost a fortune," she said as we walked through the door. I closed it behind us, only to find myself pressed against it, with Cat's mouth on my own. "Surprised?"

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting to see you twice today," I smiled before kissing her again, wrapping my arms around her and holding her tight against me.

"Got to keep up appearances for your wife," she said with a devilish smile. "When am I going to see you again?"

"I could stay in Beverly Hills tomorrow night, tell Tori I'm too tired to drive home," I offered, ducking my head to kiss her once on the cheek. "I could meet you somewhere tonight," once on her jawline. "I could play hooky tomorrow, tell my secretary to tell Tori I'm in meetings all day, and drive up to your place," last on her neck.

Cat giggled under her breath. "I'll let you know," she kissed me one last time before turning on her heel and getting into her BMW. She ignited the engine and winked at me before speeding off of my property. I shook my head before hurrying back into my house to find Tori making spaghetti.

"Man, Cat still talks just as much as she did in high school," I said with an air of annoyance. "Couldn't get her to shut up fast enough." Tori laughed as she stood over the boiling noodles. I walked behind her and wrapped her into a hug from the back, craning my neck to kiss her cheek. "I missed you."

She spun in my arms to face me. "I missed you too," she said with a wide smile. "Get the kids ready for dinner, it'll be ready in a sec."

"Got it, chief," I said before leaving her in the kitchen and herding the kids into the bathroom to wash their hands, settling into domesticity for the night, with thoughts of another woman clouding my head.


	2. i'm not rhonda

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews, especially all the positive ones! I know Bat is an unusual pairing but I hope you all will bear with me; I've been strictly Bori for a while and I truly just wanted to try something different. But if you really can't stand Bat and will only complain about my writing, kindly refrain from reading my fic. Here's the second chapter, review and subscribe! I welcome all comments and suggestions!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Victorious.

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><p>I woke up to fur in my face and unrelenting licks covering the surface of my face. I squealed as I received my daily wake-up call from the many dogs that inhabited my house and, consequently, my bed. I giggled as they scurried away, leaving me alone in my grand, billowy bed. It had been weeks since I'd been in my own home. Since I had returned from New York, I'd spent all my nights in Beck( and Tori)'s Beverly Hills apartment, even after he himself had left, drowning in sheets marked with his scent and dreaming of his return.<p>

Now that I was back in my own home, I spent most of my night overthinking and worrying about Tori finding out about me and Beck. I wasn't sure if what I felt was guilt. Was it solely my fault? This affair couldn't have happened if Beck wasn't a part of it. He wouldn't resort to an affair unless he was truly unhappy and unsatisfied with his marriage. It was thoughts like these that I used to rationalize my behavior and my actions with Beck.

Tori was a good friend, they both were. But when I was around him, I couldn't control myself. Beck was always the little crush I kept in the back of my mind and at the bottom of my heart. He was someone I could see myself with, regardless of who I was with or where I was in my life. He was someone I always had such a strong connection with, that I could talk to so easily. Evidently, he was someone I never had a chance with before this, if you could even call this a chance.

The first day of freshman year, Jade spotted him and claimed him as her own. Knowing I could never go toe-to-toe with her, that she was my friend, and that I didn't want to hurt her, I backed off. When he and Jade broke up, I felt the smallest hope in my heart. It was towards the end of senior year; we would all be going our separate ways and soon enough, we would be far enough from Jade to not be afraid of her finding out. Soon enough, none of that would matter, because he had already busied himself with Tori Vega.

After high school, I pushed Beck out of my head. I focused on my career and skyrocketed to the top of the pop charts without anyone's help. The rest of my 20s was filled with studio time, performances, promotional tours, interviews, music videos, and even film roles. Meanwhile, Beck's talent was cultivating into his and Robbie's production company, coming out with one box office hit after another and earning Beck the title of Hollywood's newest, youngest, and most handsome producer. During this time, I was still in steady contact with Tori, who confessed that as she got older, the fewer roles she was receiving and how she was desperate to marry Beck for the stability and security he could offer her.

I thought her intentions were terrible and that that was no reason to marry anyone! But at the same time, Beck loved her and I knew that, regardless of her intentions, Tori loved him as well. I kept my mouth shut and watched as everything fell into place for them. To top it all off, I was even a bridesmaid at their wedding, gritting my teeth at the moment the minister asked if anyone objected to the union. Less than a year later, Tori was pregnant with Beck's child and I was miserable and lonely travelling from city to city singing songs about him.

Groaning, I rose from bed and showered, trying to wash the guilt from my skin but my mind still littered with thoughts of him. I wanted to see him again. I knew I shouldn't, but I was drawn to him and the sheer thrill of being involved with a married man. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before; my entire life I had taken the safe route, which was why I never ended up with Beck during high school. Now was the time to be bold and take chances. This wasn't the best or the most morally sound way, of course. I'm sure I could've felt the same thrills skydiving or getting a tattoo as I did sneaking around with a good friend's husband.

It was there, under my showerhead at 12 in the afternoon, that I decided that I was going to do things for my own happiness, regardless of how selfish I might become. Up until then, I had made decisions with the future in mind, but in that moment, I wanted to live in the moment and the moment was yearning for Beck's presence. I hopped out my shower and rushed to get ready, letting my long hair flow down my back, donning a dark pair of sunglasses to conceal my identity, putting on a trench coat and finally stepping into a pair of heels.

Care of my BMW, I arrived at Beck's studio in an hour, discreetly asking a doorman to point me to his office, where his secretary was stationed outside. Lowering my sunglasses so that his secretary could recognize me, I spoke in a hushed tone. "Hey, I'm Cat Valentine, I'm a friend of Mr. Oliver's visiting. I know he's super busy and super important, but could I just pop in to surprise him? I promise to take all the blame if he gets mad." I pleaded with my signature smile and Beck's secretary, in her shock, meekly nodded and I proceeded to enter his office.

I turned the doorknob, eliciting a swift reflexive response from Beck. "Rhonda, you didn't buzz me," he said quietly, in a harsh voice. I quickly shut the door behind me and stood with my back flush against it.

Taking off my glasses, I met Beck's eyes, prompting me to freeze and my heart to skip a beat, and all I could manage to say was, "It's not Rhonda."


End file.
